In which I FINALLY reclaim some Christmas spirit...

In October I had it in spades. My emotional self was ready to get the decorations out but my common sense told me I was crazy so I let it go. I traditionally decorate the week of Thanksgiving and I told myself I could wait. But when Thanksgiving rolled around my Christmas spirit was nowhere to be found.

I blame it on deluge of Christmas hype that starts in late October/early November. By Thanksgiving I was sick of Christmas. We carried our artificial tree up to the living room and there it stands - naked. It's now December 23 and I don't see myself putting anything on that tree this year. If it wasn't for the 16 inches of snow on the ground I would have carried it back to the basement. The indoor stairs are a little narrow for the tree to maneuver so we carry it up through the yard and in the front door. I guess we'll just plug it in and look at the lights.

Doug has been concerned by my total inability to get with the spirit. I'm a little confused myself. We haven't decorated in 2 years and I was really looking forward to it this year, right up until it came time to do it, that is. Last year I was finishing up my chemo and didn't have the energy to decorate and the year before that we spent Christmas in Santa Fe with Doug's sister and her family. Since we weren't going to be home, I didn't decorate very much.

Last night I finally did my Christmas cards (yes, I know, you don't have to say it) and all of the sudden I felt the tiniest flutter of "something" in my heart. I got up and found the scotch tape and hung the cards we've received on the pillars in the living room. It looked so nice. I still don't hold out any hope for the tree but I believe that I'll put up the garlands and hang the wreath on the door when I get home today. Doug will be so surprised when he gets home!

News or Entertainment?

This morning on the Today show they lead off with the couple who crashed the state dinner party, Tiger Woods, and the Jackson Brothers. It's strange, you know, because I thought WE ARE AT WAR! I realize that they can't show the serious stuff all the time but really, to lead off with those stories trivializes the struggles of the men and women fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Am I wrong in thinking this way? Have I missed something along the way? When did the Today Show become an extension of Entertainment Tonight? For a society that is so focused on the media and instant access to the latest information about everything under the sun, it's really hard to find the news.

I listen to NPR (WYPR out of Baltimore) in the car on the way to and from work everyday and it has become my only real source for hard news. The fact that I have a 10 minute commute doesn't allow much time but I really do get more from those two 10 minutes sessions then I do for a whole half-hour of TV news or from our local newspaper. The paper focuses almost exclusively on local news with only one page devoted to world and national news. That's both on one page.

It seems that we can't handle the cold, hard facts anymore. We must be entertained or our attention wanders. I don't think it's really true but the media seems to think that we Americans have the attention span of a fruit fly and that if they don't wrap the facts in a sugary coating and then jamb them down our throats at the speed of light they'll lose us.

"Twenty-six people were killed in a roadside bombing in Iraq yesterday...oh look, a chicken!"

Come on, do we really have NADD (national attention deficit disorder)?

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

I took this photo on Friday, September 26th. On Saturday the 27th my hair started to come out. It was day 13 since the start of my Chemo so I was expecting it. Everything I heard and read said to expect the hair loss to begin 10-14 day after my first treatment. What I wasn't expecting was that it would take so long to come out. Despite diligent efforts on my part to "comb it out" with my fingers there's still a good bit left. Today I wore a turban to work for the first time though because what's left is so sparse and ugly. I took the photo below this morning. I'm going to need more headgear. I plan to stop at a local medical supply store and see what they have. The turban that I'm wearing today was a gift from the local Breast Cancer Awareness chapter. They gave me two turbans and sleeping cap. I really can't say enough good things about BCA and all the help and assistance that they offer.

The lumpectomy went very well. Little pain and no nausea from the anesthesia. I told every staffer who came in contact with me that general anesthesia makes me sick and they went out of their way to make sure that didn't happen this time. I had a pill, a shot and a patch. There was no staples or stitches, just steri-strips. All-in-all, the most pain free surgery and recovery I've ever had.



The pathology report was good and bad. The good news was that it hadn't spread to my lymph nodes. The sentinel node biopsy was clear. The margins were clear as well except that the tumor was very close to the surface of my breast. To get completely clear margins, the surgeon would have had to make a hole in my breast and she opted not to do that. Radiation will kill any cells that were left in that area.

The bad news was that it was triple negative. No positive cells were found. This means that the cancer has a higher chance of recurring and that it can recur in areas other than the breast. Triple negative cancers are also more aggresive and mine was rated grade three, which is the most aggressive.

I had my first chemo treatment on September 15th. They're giving me Adriamycin, Cytoxan, and Taxotere. It took 6 hours for all the meds to drip into my vein. I didn't get sick but had headaches and "chemo brain" for the first few days. Chemo brain is dizziness, disorintation and short term memory loss. I couldn't believe how it affected me! I was looking under the sink for clean spoons instead of in the dishwasher at one point. Scary stuff!

Next chemo - October 6th. One of my friends is taking me this time (hubby went last time) and she's a knitter too so we should have a great time. They told me that it should take an hour less this time because now that they know I'm not allergic to the meds they can let them drip in a little faster.

But the knitting goes on. I just can't knit lace or anything complicated that first week after chemo. I'm working on Eunny's Print O'the Wave stole and various socks right now.

Just a "Smidge" of Silk, Wool & Pearl

I don't know how many of you are aware but there's a tempest in a teacup going on on Ravelry about something called a Pidge. If you click that link you'll see a completely redesigned website. The company changed everything after the tempest began in an effort to save face. Their original site made all sorts of ridiculous claims about their product and how it's produced in an attempt (in my opinion) to justify the outrageous price. The prices for this bit of cashmere and wood ranged from $275 to $425. Read Quenouille's blog post about the company's claims for more information.

A group was started on Ravelry and everyone was encouraged to come up with their own "smidge" designs. The photo above is my first attempt. It's just a simple seed stitch but the beautiful silk/wool yarn and the antique pearl buttons really make it special. It's light weigh so it can be worn indoors to protect from drafts or just as a fashion accessory. My friend Jennifer modeled it for me and I think it looks great on her.

Here's the stats:
Yarn: Glenfiddich Wool in silk/wool
Pattern: Row 1 - S1,*k1, p1, repeat from * for 21 stitches. Row 2 - S1,*p1, k1, repeat from * across. Repeat rows 1 and 2 to desired length minus 1.5". Make two button holes. Repeat rows 1 and 2 for 1.5 inches. Bind off. Sew on buttons. Different yarns will require different tactics as far as the number of stitches cast on, stitch pattern, etc.

This was a quick knit that required less than 110yds of yarn and I plan to make more for Christmas from a variety of yarns.

The Busiest Season of All (for me anyway)

I've read that many people consider the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas to be their busiest time of year. For me it's fall. My husband and I belong to a farm toy collectors club and every year in November and April our club holds a farm toy show that attracts hundreds of visitors. We only have about 15 members and only 8 are really active so this means that a few people do a tremendous amount of work. Our most important activity outside of the two shows is to sell chances on a pedal tractor to raise money for a scholarship. Every year we award a $1,000 scholarship to an area senior. That's a lot of chances for 8 people to sell. Doug, Linda and I take the pedal tractor around to various tractor shows and festivals, most of which are held in the fall. This provides many opportunities for Knitting in Public.

I knit in public all the time so when I learned that many consider this to be an unusual activity I was a little puzzled. Yes, I get comments and questions but I've never had anything other then a positive experience. More often than not, I'm approached by other knitters who want to ask about my yarn or pattern. I love this aspect of knitting in public.

Saturday Doug and I went to Crownsville, Maryland for the Renaissance Festival and I took my baby socks to work on while we're sitting around watching people (and drinking beer). I saw a woman knitting on the bench where I had been sitting and knitting just a few minutes before. I approached her we got to talking and really hit it off. It is amazing how many subjects we touched on during our short conversation. Her name is Sherry and she was there with her family. She was working on a sock but told me that she had only been knitting for a few months. You would have never guessed that by watching her knit. She went to a social knitting group with her daughter in Columbia, Maryland and I think that's how she got pulled into the knitting universe.

The Saturday before, I was knitting at an arts and crafts festival where we were selling chances on the pedal tractor when a little girl about 9 or 10 walked up to me and said, "You're knitting a sock." I was stunned. Not only did she know I was knitting but that I was knitting a sock. She scampered off before I could ask her how she knew what I was knitting. I looked at my knitting and it wasn't really to the point where it looked unmistakably like a sock hanging off my needles but she recognized it as such. I hope whoever the sock knitter is in her life teaches her how to knit.

Being out and about with time on my hands is a wonderful thing right now because I can sit and knit (or stand and knit) and I get to meet new friends like Sherry.

The Next New Thing

I buy two Vogue magazines each year, the big spring and fall issues. I'm not a slave to fashion but I like to see what the trends are especially in knitwear. One of the latest trends had left me baffled.

Toe-less knee socks.

Have you seen these things? They have a heel and gusset and a band of ribbing and that's it. They come to an abrupt halt about halfway down the instep. They were everywhere in the fall issue. Usually two tone though I did see some solids.

Here's a link to the page where I found this photo. You have to scroll down to read about the socks. If you scroll down a little farther you'll see a blurb about fingerless gloves.

I guess this year's fashion statement is frostbitten toes and fingers.

The Desert of Maryland

It's not a fit day out for man nor beast so the beasts and I are hanging around in the air-conditioned house today. Hazy, hot and humid - the three words that best describe Maryland in the summer - weather has been entrenched here for a few days and shows no sign of leaving in the near future. Add dry to that description and you've got a more accurate picture. But dry doesn't really do it justice. Crispy, burnt, crunchy, those words describe our lawn. It's not grass anymore, it's straw. We are in a drought here in western Maryland, a pretty severe drought.

There's a mountain in the background but you can't see it because of the haze. Three years ago our landscaper planted sunset maples along our driveway, ten on each side. We've been in a drought ever since. Rainfall totals have been far below normal each year so we have been force to water the maples during the summer both to protect our investment and to keep the poor things alive. We've only lost one thanks to Doug's dedication and determination. But it's a lot of work to water them as they should be watered and two of them are showing signs of stress. Leaves are falling here at Idle Hour Farm and it's not fall yet. It makes us both very sad. The haze, the white sky seems so oppressive to me. Don't even like to look out the window and I hate to take photos in this white, sickening glare.

This is a tree in distress. It hurts me to look at it but I drive past it each time I leave and return to the house. Doug keeps pouring the water on them but the sun bakes it out of the ground before it can benefit the thirsty roots. Even watering at night doesn't seem to help.

We've begun to refer to this area as the Desert of Maryland although the whole state is hurting for rain. The weather patterns in this small area seem to have changed in the last ten years. We don't get enough snow or rain anymore. It all goes around us or breaks up before is gets to us. A few more years of this and the local vegetation will make a shift to plants that can stand the arid conditions.

I want to move to Maine.

Ok, now I understand...

I purchased my first-ever Socks That Rock (lightweight) last year at Stitches East. I picked up five skeins at the Blue Moon booth and brought them home, put them in a Rubbermaid tub and never really thought too much about them. I knew I'd get to them someday. Saturday morning I got one out (Fairgrounds) and wound it into a cake and decided to make the Anastasia Socks by Pepperknit.

I know about the fascination (obsession) with Socks That Rock here in Blogland and it's very pretty and all but I guess I just didn't get it. That was until Saturday night at the baseball game when I cast on and started knitting with it for the first time.

WOW!! It's so-o-o tight. I don't spin so I don't know how else to describe what it is that's so different from the other yarns I've knit with. Is it tightly plied? Tightly spun? Both? I don't know, but it's smooth. No splittyness (well if it's not a word it should be) whatsoever.

The softness, the stitch definition, the squishiness - indescribable. I've joined the other Socks That Rock devotees (addicts, zombies) and will make that booth my first stop at Stitches East in October and stand in line with my sister sock knitters.

I saw the line at Maryland Sheep & Wool and skirted it to see what all the fuss was about. "Oh," I said to myself, "Socks That Rock. I have five skeins of that at home. I'm certainly not standing in that line for more."

Ha! I just hope I haven't incurred the wrath of the yarn goddess with my dismissive attitude. Please forgive this humble woman for her ignorance, oh great Mistress of the Skeins. I was blind but now I knit.


Edited to add: I'm using the KA High Quality Bamboo Needles in size 0US/2.0mm instead of my usual KnitPicks dpns and I like them. The Brittany size 0's that I used in the past were too weak to pick up and knit the wraps on my shortrow heel. I snapped one on the first sock I knit with them. But these KA's are tough. Almost no bending, even on the k2tog's. They're made in Japan of aged bamboo and I guess that makes all the difference. Mine came from Y2Knit.


Here's a picture of the points for comparison. The KA's are a little blunter but sometimes that's a good thing. The KnitPicks are capable of drawing blood.

The "See-food" Diet

I saw this on PBS the other night and nearly tossed my cookies. I'm not easily sickened but this has haunted me ever since I saw it. I told my husband, who also saw it, that I would give just about anything to have those last few minutes back. I will carry this bit of video with me for the rest of my life. I found the website of the man who shot the video (link to the YouTube video is on the right).

Visit the site if you're interested but DO NOT WATCH THE VIDEO UNLESS YOU WANT TO BE CHANGED FOREVER!

If you don't want to watch the video here is the narrative. It's easier to read about it than watch it, believe me!



POINT OF VIEW:

Hardy Jones, BlueVoice.org

"I’ve been going to Japan for over 25 years. They have a great cultural historical tie to hunting whales and dolphins and they make no bones about the fact that they’re doing it.

Imagine a school of dolphins frolicking off the coast. Suddenly they hear the sound of engines and then the overwhelming painful sounds of the banging of metal bars. The dolphins flee before the terrifying sounds. But their flight takes them in to a confined and unfamiliar space. They extract the young and the pretty and they put them in slings and they send them off to aquariums where they’re going to pay anywhere from $4000 to up to $50,000 a head.

Then they kill the rest for the dolphin meat. The horror of lying on your side out of the water, having trouble breathing, hearing the sounds of your pod mates as they’re slaughtered. I just said to myself, just keep filming. Just keep filming, and then get this film out of here.

They always want the video. They always want the video from you. Then I just ran away from them. I knew what those dolphins were experiencing.The only thing I can do is take pictures and show the world what they are doing."



I've seen a lot of documentaries about dolphins and I'm not one of these bleeding hearts who think they're just like you and me. Or maybe I should refrase that and say that maybe they're too much like you and me. They have their vices just like us. But they are intelligent creatures who don't deserve to die like this.

Here are a couple other links. The first one is another, equally disturbing video so be warned!

Save the Dolphins
PBS Frontline Report


When I went to read "Sherman's Lagoon" this morning I noticed a link on the home page to this - Seafood Watch. If you love seafood AND care about the environment (and I know you do) you should check this out.

The only thing I can't figure out is how you know where the seafood you eat in a restaurant comes from? I have a feeling that if I sit down in Red Lobster and ask them whether the shrimp in the scampi are from the US or Mexico, farm-raised or wild-caught, I'm just going to get a blank look. Even the management probably has no clue where or how the seafood they serve was caught. Sure, in some fancy restaurant on the shore they probably know exactly where the fish came from but what about all the chains? In some parts of the country that's your only alternative for a seafood dinner.

The Harlot Represents

I've been following the story of the Yarn Harlot and her quest to "represent". To show the muggles (non-knitters) just how many knitters there are and how serious they are about their knitting. She got tired to speaking in cramped bookstores and tiny reception halls because the muggles who organize her book tours constantly underestimate the number of attendees. It was her hope to fill the 775 seat auditorium at The Fashion Institute of Technology in NYC. She did.

Wow, I wish I could have been there! It must have really been something. And it's about time that knitting gets some good publicity. When I knit in public (often) I don't think I really make people think about their concept of a knitter because I'm almost 50 and probably fall into the grandmotherly stereotype. People need to see young knitters and male knitters to really understand that it isn't just something that Granny does while rocking on the porch. They need to see modern, well designed and constructed items in really nice yarns that didn't come from Walmart.

I can't have the impact of the Yarn Harlot but I make it my business to knit in public when ever and where ever I can. Every person who asks me about what I'm doing gets a detailed explanation of the process and the project as well as encouragement to visit the local yarn shop and check out the inventory of wool, silk, cashmere, alpaca, etc. I encourage people to ask Susan about lessons. I tell them that she taught me and look at what I'm doing now. If they haven't wandered off, I tell them about Social Knitting on Friday nights and about the wonderful friends I've made through knitting and the charity knitting we've done.

If I could get just one person interested enough to visit the shop and sign up for lessons, I would feel... what would I feel? Joyful, fulfilled, elated? I know I would be very happy to have another knitting friend and to know that I helped to introduce someone to a marvelous new lifestyle.

A New Project

I started the Shell Beach Shawl by Dawn Leeseman in a Blue Heron Yarns silk/rayon twist from Y2Knit. God, how I love this yarn! The colorway is Tulip and it is stunning. Susan, who owns Y2Knit, had the same shawl hanging in the store and I just had to make it for myself. It's going very fast on #15 US needles and I should have it finished in a couple hours.

If you asked me to review the yarn I would have to say that it wants to stick to itself a little. This pattern calls for 3 rows of k1, yo2 all the way across. When it's time to turn the work and go back it's a real struggle to get those stitches and wraps off the cable and onto the needle. I'm not a really tight knitter so that isn't the issue. The yarn is just "grippy". This is just a slight annoyance however, and definitely wouldn't stop me from using this beautiful yarn again in the future.

Work continues on the Baudelaire socks.

It is a little loose but I can live with it. As I said in an earlier post, this is my first toe-up sock and I'm working on the gusset.

I think it's looking pretty good. I just hope I didn't start the gusset too late. Only time and more knitting will tell.

As for the Baby Kimono from Interweave Knits, I've had to stop because we can't locate anymore of the yarn in that dye lot (Claudia Hand Paints, Fingering Wt., Dye Lot 004 - Freesia). I thought I might take it along with me to Stitches East and see if I can find some. Meanwhile I will start it again in a different colorway. And THIS TIME I will buy 3 skeins.

Exercise or knit? Which would you rather do?

I continue to reconstruct Icarus. As you will recall, I ripped back to the beginning of the last repeat of Chart 1 on Tuesday. I've done 5 rows since then. I simply can't do this and watch tv. From now on I will listen to podcasts and audio book while I knit on this shawl. I know you experienced lace knitters are saying to yourselves, "What is her problem? Chart 1 is the easy part!" but I keep making mistakes. Complacent inattentiveness, I guess. Still when all is said and done, I'm enjoying the hell out of this and I know it's going to look great when it's done.

I am so obsessed with finishing this that I even resent the half-hour that I spend at Curves and wondered if I could knit while I work out. All the time I'm there I'm thinking that I could be knitting. Hell, I'd rather be doing just about anything else. I find Curves to be so mind-numbingly boring that I can barely force myself to go. I know it's only one half-hour three times a week and I know it's good for me but does it have to be so dull? The ladies there try to perk it up by having games and puzzles to do while you exercise and that has helped tremendously but those of us with short attention spans are still counting the seconds 'til we finish that last repeat. Or maybe I'm the only one who feel that way.

Anyway, tonight is a baseball game and if it doesn't rain (over 8" since Sunday here) we'll be going. That means a few hours of uninterrupted knitting. The stadium flooded Monday with water waist deep in the dugouts and a couple feet in the locker rooms and the offices, but they played last night after a late start. There's no stopping the boys of summer.

Knitting in Public

I knit in public a lot. I'm always dragging my knitting around here, there, and everywhere. So it's funny that I didn't get to participate in National (or World) Knit in Public Day. I didn't have to go anywhere so I stayed home and knitted until time to go to a wedding. I took the knitting along to the wedding but it was too crowded at the reception to knit.

But yesterday I was at the Mall waiting for a friend to show up. We were going to the movies and I had time to kill so I was knitting on a bench near the food court. Everyone ignored me except one very young couple. The man (hardly more than a teenager) walked over to me and asked if what I was doing was hard. I told him no, it wasn't hard at all. He said thanks and walked away with his female companion. I was left wondering what motived him to come over and ask me that question. He didn't ask me what I was doing as some people do. "Is that knitting or crocheting?" I get that one occasionally. He must have known what it was. Why was he interested and not his companion? Questions, questions.

I continue with Icarus. I still hope to finish by July 7 when the Mystery Stole begins.

I finally got an iPod!!!

I created this blog last Friday, May 12, 2006, and I have been looking at other blogs all week. I was interested in podcast but had no way to listen to them other than with the laptop. I got to thinking about an mp3 player. I have wanted one for a long time but never really had a good reason to get one other than plain old desire. I am a geek girl, after all. Then on Wednesday I read a mention of video podcast for knitting and I decided that the time had come. I needed an mp3 player right away.

I should stop and say that my boss is the one who got me started on this. I work for a local government IT department and my boss assigned me to get up-to-date on blogs and podcast in case the county commissioners decided that they might want to move in that direction. He bought me a couple books and sent me on my merry way. Two weeks later and here I am!

So anyway, back to the mp3 player. When I decided I must have one on Wednesday afternoon I started doing some research. Though I have never had much experience with Apple products (except back at the dawn of personal computers when they were the only game in town) I quickly decided that an iPod was the way to go. It has the most accessories and seems to be the one most likely to be around for a while. The price was outrageous but Circuit City had the 30g video model on sale for $284. When my husdand called later that afternoon I casually mentioned that I would like to go to Circuit City and "look" at the iPods. To my amazement he didn't put up much of a fight. Perhap he already sensed that resistance would be futile.

As you already know "looking" turned into "buying". I am stunned at how little actually comes with this thing. Apple must rely on the sales of accessories to make the bulk of their money. The only accessory I bought was a decent case since I heard that they scratch easily and I didn't want anything to mar this sleek black and chrome beauty.

Not being a genXer, I has taken me a while to get familiar with the controls and techniques but I am downloading podcasts left and right. One that have particularly enjoyed is Pointy Sticks. She mixes knitting information and stories with really good musical selections. I totally enjoyed the two I listened to yesterday.

Now, if you will excuse me I must go search for more podcasts.

Why bother to knit it myself

I was looking at a Norm Thompson catalog last night and noticed that they offer quite a few cabled sweaters. This got me to thinking about how a sweater that I hand-knit is different from one that was machine-knit or hand-knit by some underpaid worker in a third-world country.

First of all, I knit because I love the process. It's nice to have something to wear when you're done but let's face it, I don't finish every project that I start. I know! Shocking isn't it? I have been known, just recently in fact, to rip out a sock that was nearly finished and do it over just because I didn't like the way it looked on my foot. And I didn't complain because I love to make socks more than I love to wear them.

Long before I learned to knit I was a hand-knit sweater junkie. I spent a lot of money on sweaters because I loved that warmth, the bulk, the comfort and the style of a hand-knit sweater. While I was buying these sweaters I wondered who made it and what conditions was it made under. I like to think that I was helping a woman earn some money so that she could help her family live a better life. But really, for all I know those sweaters could have been knit by a chlid who knits 10-12 hours a day in exchange for a bowl of rice. Or a political prisoner. Or a grandmother who likes to earn a little extra spending money. I have no idea because the label just doesn't usually give you that kind of information. And even if the label said it was knitted by a cooperative of Peruvian women who would otherwise have little or no source of income, how do I know that's true?

For many years now I have refused to buy anything that was labeled as hand-knit or hand-crocheted. Maybe it's irrational but I just won't take a chance on condoning the exploitation someone who is, in my opinion, creating a work of art. It's one thing to be shackled to a machine turning out widgets and a totally different thing to be packed into a room with piles of yarn and told to knit or crochet. Why do I think it's different? Because people like me look at those hand-made items and we think "Oh, how lovely!". We can't tell whether it was made by someone who loved what they were doing or by someone who had no choice.

I'll get down off my soap box now. Sorry if I got a little carried away.

Why am I obsessed?

It's like a fever or an addiction. When I'm not knitting all I can think about is knitting. I'm in it's clutches right now but I know from experience that it will fade. I've been here before and it always eases up and is replaced (temporarily) by some other obsession.

But never the less I still question it's hold on me. Why can I concentrate on nothing else? I think part of the reason may be the fact that I have finished a few things and am wearing and enjoying them. That makes me want to make more things that I can wear and enjoy. Smaller projects that can be completed in a short time are what I making right now. Shawls, shrugs, stoles, scarves, socks. God, they all start with an "s". What does that mean? Is it a "s"ign?